Me. Uncensored.

I’m all over the place. My mind keeps running around on different things today. Ok, well, two different things.

1. Starting my photography business.

I keep looking up sample business plans to get financing for my dream business. It seems like a lot of work, but I know that in the end it’ll be worth all the hard work should I be approved for financing. No idea when I’ll actually have it done, but I have hope that I will be able to accomplish this dream I have.  The only thing that bothers me is that I still have no solid experience with lighting equipment, but I’ve been reading books for months trying to figure it out. Thing is, I never know how to do it, no matter how many times I’ve read about it – until I do it. So one of these days, I’ll have to drop some cash on an actual lighting kit. Decent ones are pricy-ish but in order to have quality in the photography world, you have to pay the price.

2. Being a homeowner.

This one is a little but more complex, considering we don’t know where we’ll get stationed in April yet. The husband has yet to speak to the detailer which he’s supposed to do, well, soon. Most of me really wants to go back to Virginia since he has to return to a boat. Virginia is where my support system is. Granted almost all of the friends that I had there have long moved away, but my family is there and I guess in my mind that’s all that matters. Our last night in Virgina, I burst into tears because I wanted to stay. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t want to stay without my husband, but I desperately want to move on with the next period of our lives. Apartment living is obnoxious – at least where we are. I’ve lived in a decent apartment before but the decent apartment was double what our target mortgage range is. I want to be able to decorate, paint, refinish; I want to make something mine. Ours.

I’ve been looking at home prices in the area where we’d both like to live, and they’re reasonably priced though the mortgage is a bit higher than we’d like to pay. I, personally, don’t want to be ‘house poor’. Man, I really wish we could get on that HGTV show ‘Property Virgins‘. Sandra Rinomato, WHERE ARE YOU? I’ve also been looking at modular homes, since they cost about the same regular house, and appreciate in the same way. Only thing is, we’d have to find the land for one.

Ideally, I’d like to have three bedrooms, and at least two bathrooms. One master, one guest bedroom/child’s room (when the time comes) and one office/craft room. One master bathroom and one community bathroom. Two and a half bathrooms wouldn’t hurt, but I know I’m already wising too much. I like craftsman, cape cods, and new traditional style homes. Shawn likes colonials. Man, when we actually get to the actual house hunting – its going to be hard to please us both, for sure.

Honestly, I know I probably shouldn’t want so much out of our first house. We don’t know how long we’d stay in the property, we could stay for 10 years or we could stay a lifetime. I guess I just want that one place that’s secure and won’t ever leave. Something steady and comforting. Somewhere people can come to stay and feel welcomed by our home. Somewhere we can grow and something we can take pride in.